My story

I want somebody to know what i am going through. I am from India. I am married to a monster and mentally unstable person and I came to know about it in the first few months of my marriage. I couldnt tell anyone because i am afraid. In the two years i am married he beat me up seven times and i remember everyone of them distinctly. I even tried to commit suicide when nobody is at home because i am so scared that when he comes back he will beat me again. It was a horrible experience.Then i remembered my dad and what would happen to him if i really did something like that and so whenever my husband got angry i used to lock myself up so that he will never get to me.I wanted to leave the house so many times but i am scared of spoiling the reputation of my father. I never told anyone and just endured it when he tortured me about money.I just hoped that it will go away someday.I just hoped that someday he might change.But i dont think that he will ever change because he doesnt think that beating people is wrong. Thats the reason i dont want kids. Because i am afraid that he will beat them too and i dont want my children to grow up like that. I am writing this because if something happened to me u may hear various account of the incident but i just wanted somebody to know my side of it. Everybody has problems. True. But they will get easier if you have someone to face them with.But what if the problem is the person you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with.. So now i dont know what i am supposed to do.I have a job now. So i can live without depending on him. Even so he is harassing me for my salary. He told me that he married me for money and he wont tolerate it if i ever give it to anybody else even my parents.I decided to leave this house and live my life by joining a hostel.Everybody has a breaking point and i have reached mine.I have endured so much and couldnt anymore. I never told anyone and now its time i do.This is my story and going away is the only option i have because u cant treat a person who thinks there is nothing wrong with him. If you have any other suggestions i would very much like to hear them. Divorce is not an option for me.

Tips While Buying Vehicles From Car Dealerships

Considering that a car dealership is a business and performing a necessary service -getting the car from the factory to you-some profit is definitely deserved.For most of us financing is the only way we can afford a car.A general guideline is that your monthly car payment should not be more than 20 percent of your take home pay.To save money consider buying a second tier car from the less popular but still reliable manufacturers.

First things first you have to decide what car you want to buy.A powerful first step in car buying process is to get approved for a loan.The most important thing to learn is that no matter how good the price is that you get a deal isn't a good deal until you have done everything right in the finance and insurance office.With all the advertising you see about getting the best price you need to know that price is only one component of a great deal.

You ave two choices: paying in full or finance overtime.Dealers and other finance sources offer a variety of financing terms.Tell the sales person and the sales manager that you'll sign the paperwork the paperwork the minute they hit your target figure.Try and buy a new car for $500-$1000 less than true market value.Be prepared when you buy a used car by learning about car inspections ,vehicle history report ,used car sales tax and fees and more.

Online car shopping for used and new cars is quick and easy.You've decided on a car trade-in.The trouble is dealers have experience on their side and extracting the best deal takes research ,savvy and a bold approach.If you are borrowing about $25000 for a new car a difference of only two percentage points in the interest rate can add upto more than $1000 over the lifetime of the loan.Even before you know which vehicle you are going to buy you can get a jump on the process by comparing interest rates and getting pre-approved for a loan.

Get Approved For A Car Loan:

The majority of consumers these days finance their vehicle purchases and many of them do so through the dealership finance and insurance department where they are purchasing their new or used car.It is often best to get your car loan pre-approved through a bank,credit union or online lender before you step foot on the dealership lot.While more shoppers are enhancing their experience and gaining knowledge by using online tools there is still something to be said for actually test driving a vehicle you are considering.

With today's availability of ready information via the internet or the like i recommend that anyone looking to purchase a car spend some time doing research first. Experts suggest that you get preapproved for a loan before making a purchase.You don't necessarily have to borrow money when you get preapproved.Know your auto financing offers in advance to purchase new and used vehicles. Know your APR and estimated monthly payment before you talk to a dealer.

In a perfect world we would all pay cash for our cars and never have to worry about debt or monthly payments.The  problem with starting your car financing at the dealership is that you don't know  whether the loan you are being offered is the best financing you can get.

Price Your Car And Your Trade In:

Negotiating can be one of the most intimidating things about buying a new car.It's important not to negotiate based on a car's monthly payment but based on the purchase price instead.If you are in the market for a new car but need to get rid of your old one first you are probably not looking forward to haggling with a dealer about your car's trade-in value.It is possible to do well in a transaction with a dealer but you have to do your research.

Follow the news and trends.Give the car an equivalent of curb appeal so the potential buyer's initial reaction is positive.

Try Negotiating A Lower Price:

Before you head for the dealership you will have already done your homework so you will know the dealers invoice price whether rebates or dealer incentives are available and your target price as well as where you start bidding. You want to start bidding as low as you reasonably can but not so low that you will seem like an uninformed buyer just making a low ball offer.Nothing helps like narrow things down like seeing a bunch of cars in person.

Its okay to get the assistance of the sales person just keep things general.Before you even set foot on a showroom floor it makes sense to call around and get quotes from competing dealers.The best part about quote programs is that they give you exactly what you are interested in :the price of the car you want without confusing factors like the value of your trade-in or what you'll do for financing.Many people are confused about how to start a negotiation which usually takes place when you and the sales person sit down in a sales office at a dealership.

Make sure you know the numbers behind the deal.The first towards negotiating a lower price is to figure out exactly what other consumers are paying for it. Don't answer any of the sales person's questions especially about the spending limit.Though new cars aren't as elastic a commodity as used vehicles you can still talk down the sticker price by a thousand dollars or more.The best place to start out your research is the internet.

When you go to the dealership be relaxed.Always know the invoice price and negotiate up from that.Insist on negotiating one thing at a time. Your first priority is to settle on the lowest price you can get on the new vehicle.

Harassment:Resolving Conflict

When people work together misunderstanding and conflict are inevitable but this should not be allowed to escalate.Harassing is an improper conduct by an individual that is directed at and offensive to another individual including at any work or any location related to work and that the individual knew or ought reasonably to have known would cause offence or harm.The employer is ultimately responsible for providing and supporting a harassment and discrimination-free work place for all employees.

All employees are entitled to pursue their duties in a respectful work place.In some cases conflict can be a good thing like process improvements or better ideas to serve the customer.

Start With Prevention Of Harassment:

Essentially the definition of harassment means that more than one act or event need to be present in order to constitute harassment ans that taken individually this act or event may not constitute harassment. It is the repetition that generates the harassment.Most successful preventive strategies and plans on sexual harassment require the involvement of all those concerned and a clear statement of intent.

Anti-harassment policies explain what harassment is ,tell all employees that harassment will not be tolerated and set out how employers and employees should respond to incidents of harassment.This is your legal obligation,but it also makes good business sense.The same laws that prohibit gender discrimination prohibit sexual harassment.

What Is Harassment:

Harassment is a form of discrimination.It involves any unwanted physical or verbal behavior that offends or humiliates you.The term harassment can mean different things,and can take place different settings,including your home,your work of place,your school or via the phone or internet.This can include things such as unwanted attention being followed or persistent sending of letters or unwanted gifts.

Although harassment is often thought of as an overt use of power it can also appear in more subtle guises.Bullying can be defined as an offensive behavior which violates a person's dignity or creates an intimidating,hostile,degrading or offensive environment or which humiliates or undermines an individual or group.There are two elements involved in harassment,one involves behavior that is improper or abusive ,the other with behavior that is unwelcome or unwanted.

The behavior is considered unwelcome if it is perceived as such by the person being harassed.Harassment often occurs when there is a disparity of power not just when men and women work together.A third person can be offended by harassing behavior among willing participants.The purposes may vary including racial prejudice,personal malice,an attempt to force someone to quit a job or grant sexual favors ,apply illegal pressure to collect a bill or merely gain sadistic pleasure in making someone fearful or anxious.

A systematic pattern of harassment by an employee against another worker may subject the employer to a law suit for failure to protect the worker.Harassment is both a criminal offence and a civil action under the protection from harassment act 1997.The act also says you must have experienced at least two incidents by the same person or group of people for it to be harassment.Generally criminal harassment entails intentionally targeting someone else with behavior that was meant to alarm ,annoy,torment or terrorize them.

Though state harassment laws vary they often take different levels and methods of harassment into account.Sexual harassment may be homosexual or hetero sexual.Racial harassment is any behavior deliberate or otherwise pertaining to race,color,nationality including citizenship or ethnic or national origins which is directed at an individual or group or which is found to be offensive or objectionable to recipients and which creates an intimidating,hostile or offensive environment.

Harassment At Work:

The employment equality acts 1998-2011 place an obligation  on all employers to prevent harassment in the workplace. Under this law you are entitled to bring a claim to the equality tribunal and your employer may be obliged to pay compensation if you are harassed.Prevention is the best tool to eliminate harassment in the workplace.The employer is automatically liable for harassment by a supervisor that results in a negative employment action such as termination,failure to promote or hire ,and loss of wages.

A complaint of harassment must be filed within twelve months of the last event of the alleged harassment leading to the complaint unless there are extenuating circumstances. Preventing a person from expressing himself or herself: threatening,constantly interrupting that person,prohibiting the person from speaking to others comes under harassment.A hostile environment is created as a result of the harassment by a co-worker,supervisor or visitor.

If you feel like you have been a victim of work place harassment it is important to file  a claim with Equal Employment Opportunity Commission(EEOC).Harassment can not only cost an employee their job but it can also make  job searching difficult. References may be hard to get and it can be difficult to explain the circumstances of why you lost a job during the job interview. Just like their immature little brothers and sisters on the school yard work place bullies use the same tools of intimidation and manipulation to bring you down.

Watch the sure signs of a bully that signifies more than a simple misunderstanding or personal disagreement.As unpleasant as it may sound the first thing you should do is confront the person who is mistreating you.If your conversation doesn't resolve the problem or if you decided to skip the conversation altogether the next step is to make an internal complaint.

  

Signs And Symptoms Of Drug Abuse

Most drug addictions start with experimental  use of a drug in social situations. As time passes you may need larger doses of the drug to get high.A symptom is something the patient senses and describes while a sign is something other people such as the doctor notice. When a person is addicted to a substance such as a drug,alcohol and nicotine they are not able to control the use of the substance.

Addiction-both to prescription and street drugs is a growing problem. You need more and more of a substance to get the same effects and you can take more before you feel an effect.Some people are able to use recreational or prescription drugs without ever experiencing negative consequences or addiction.If you are worried about your own or a friend or family members drug use it's important to know that help is available.

The use and abuse of drugs are serious issues that should not be ignored or minimized and we should not sit back and hope they just go away.Drug dependence involves all the symptoms of drug abuse but also involves another element physical dependence.Heroine produces a downer effect that rapidly induces a state of relaxation and euphoria. Loved ones or co-workers may notice a number of signs of heroine use which are visible during and after heroine consumption.

Prescription drug abuse and addiction is one of the most poorly recognized types of chemical dependency particularly in women. Drug seeking behaviors are the primary signs prescription drug abuse regardless of the chemical makeup of the medication.In isolation many of the signals a teenager or adult is abusing alcohol or drugs could be signs of normal behavior.If some of these warning signs apply to you or someone you love it may be time to get help before the issue worsens.

The key is change-it is important to watch for any significant changes in the persons physical appearance ,personality,attitude and behavior.Changes in mental and physical stimulation,altered perception of sound,light and touch.Short-lasting euphoria ,giggling,silliness,dizziness.

Understanding Drug Use,Abuse,Addiction:

Many people do not understand why or how other people become addicted to drugs.Drug abuse and addiction have negative consequences for individuals and society.Drug addiction is a complex illness.The path to drug addiction begins with the act of taking drugs.People experiment with drugs for many different reasons.Addiction is a complex disorder characterized by a compulsive drug use.Many people mistakenly view drug abuse and addiction as strictly a social problem and may characterize those who take drugs as morally weak.

What people often under estimate is the complexity of drug addiction -that it is a disease that impacts the brain and because of that stopping drug abuse is not simply a matter of will power.Substance abuse is a major public health problem that affects millions of people and places enormous financial and social burdens on society. The use of alcohol and other drugs is a multifaceted phenomenon varying with the individuals level of use and the dysfunction he or she experiences as a result of his or her use.

Drug addiction is a chronic often relapsing brain disease that causes compulsive drug seeking and use despite harmful consequences to the addicted individual and to those around him or her.Recent scientific advances including those supported by national institute on drug abuse have enlightened our view of drug abuse and addiction which is now recognized as a chronic relapsing brain disease expressed in the form of compulsive behaviors.

The personal and family tragedies related to addiction are heart rending and quite often desperate.Ground breaking discoveries about the brain have revolutionized our understanding of addiction enabling us to respond effectively to the problem.Approximately 10% of any population is addicted to drugs or alcohol.An addictive substance feels good because it stimulates the pleasure center of the brain through neurotransmitters such as dopa-mine and GABA.

Abuse would be a milder form of the disorder than substance dependence.Substance dependence is a more severe form of addiction.

How Drug Abuse ,Addiction Develops:

The development of dependence can be seen as part of a learning process in the sense that enduring changes in the behavior result from interactions with psycho active substances and their associated environments.The brain has systems that are evolved to guide and direct behavior toward stimuli that are critical to survival.The rewarding effects of drugs alone cannot account for why some psychoactive drugs can lead to all of the behaviors associated with addiction.

The development of drug addiction can be explained by the effects of the drug on specific areas of the brain that increase an individuals motivation to use the drug.When drugs such as heroin are used repeatedly over time tolerance may develop.The development of tolerance to analgesic effects of morphine involves different areas of the brain separate from those of the reward pathway. Teen substance use can progress sometimes rapidly from experimenting or occasional use to abuse and dependence.

Teens try alcohol,cigarettes and chemicals and other drugs for many of the same reason that adults use them to relax or feel good.The transition from childhood to adult life is perhaps one of the most difficult periods we encounter over our life span.The mental and the physical status of the child at the onset of the adolescence may predetermine or at least influence the ease with which the individual moves through this transition period.

Drug addiction is defined both by the existence of psychological dependence and physical dependence on at least one illicit substance.When you are unable to use your drug of choice despite a desire to live without addiction when you experience physical withdrawal symptoms when you attempt to stop getting high,when you crave your drug of choice and obsess about getting more -these are just a few active symptoms of drug addiction.

Many people  with post traumatic stress disorder will turn to drugs or alcohol as a way to numb their pain or to gain some measure of control in their lives.The nightmares and flashbacks of PTSD typically involve crisis that have never been fully resolved in the individual's psyche.There can be a great deal of confusion surrounding the words addiction,physical dependence and tolerance.Tolerance refers to a psychological state where the effectiveness of a drug has decreased due to chronic administration.

  

Care giving, as a family affair

As a child you probably didn't like it when others compared you to your siblings. You and your siblings each have a unique relationship with your parents. Because of so much what family caregivers do is performed outside of health care institutions or physicians offices, it is not consistently or accurately measured- an essential first step to insightful analysis. Informal caregivers provide most of the long-term care to elderly or disabled persons living in the community.

Caring for an older family member often requires team work. First try to define the care giving responsibilities.

Supporting a local caregiver from far away:

If you live an hour or more from a person who needs care you can think of yourself as a long-distance care giver. Care giving,no matter where the care giver lives ,is often long-standing and ever-expanding.Decide who will be responsible for which tasks. Agree in advance how each of your efforts can complement one another so that you can be an effective team. More and more family care givers are facing the challenge of  caring from afar.  Offer emotional support to the persons primary care giver.

Checking in if its a professional care giver  can like wise boost morale and help avoid a disruptive staff turn over.According to the family care giver alliance one in four households -29.2 million family caregivers is involved in elder care today,a surge of more than 300 percent since 1987.In the old days,ailing parents would most often be looked after by their adult children. Whether or not primary care givers share expectations with family members who live far away there are likely to be unstated expectations on both sides of the family's fence.

A family member who lives far away may assume that relatives who live locally need to do whatever it takes to care for their chronically ill parents without being  asked.Skilled professionals and cutting edge technologies combine to effectively dispatch tasks related to caring for loved ones living far from concerned care givers. Overcoming the challenges of caring for an ailing loved one from afar takes organisation,team work,  and certain amount of trust that tasks will be completed without direct supervision.

The national institute of aging estimates that there may be as many as seven million people providing long distance care in the united states. Depending on your parents desire to stay in their home or community their health situation and the configuration of your house moving them home may not be realistic.

Splitting care giving responsibilities:

When siblings are the care givers things can become even more chaotic.Keep it simple to begin with. Sharing isn't always easy for brothers and sisters who grow up under the same roof. According  to the research conducted for the home instead of senior care network sharing the care of elderly parents can be as much of a challenge for adult siblings. Siblings often face challenges and delicate situations when sharing the duties of caring for an aging parent.

The 50 represents the average age of caregivers caring for aging parents.Today's adult children and their parents are going through a new kind of family transition.Siblings are also going through a major emotional passage that stirs up feelings from childhood.

Talk about caregiving responsibilities:

More than ever before,families are providing long term care to older adults with limitations in the ability to perform tasks necessary for independent living. Care-giving is what professionals called the unpaid work of family members that make it possible for spouses and parents to live at home longer. An estimated 25.5 million Americans face challenges everyday as they struggle to balance work responsibilities with caring for a relative aged 50 or older.

The good news is that many employers are sympathetic to these demands.As a family caregiver you may find yourself facing a host of new responsibilities many of which are unfamiliar or intimidating.Providing care for a family member in need is an age old act of kindness ,love and loyalty.Many caregivers say that caring for a loved one nearing death was an important time of personal growth.

Care-giving is extremely rewarding ,but also very demanding.A caregiver is often responsible for giving care at home.Being a caregiver often involves taking on many new and important responsibilities.

Business Knowledge Management

Managers are bombarded with an almost constant stream of data everyday. This overload of data is making knowledge management increasingly more important. Knowledge management is a concept and a term that arose approximately two decades ago. Knowledge management is the process of capturing,distributing and effectively using knowledge. Business intelligence is a set of theories and methodologies that handle large amounts of data and information and assists managers with decision making.

Knowledge management is a process of capturing and distributing the knowledge of the individuals in a business for use by others in the business to improve the quality and efficiency of decision making across the firm.Knowledge management involves data mining and some method of  operation to push information to users.The goal of a knowledge management system is to provide managers with the ability to organize and locate relevant content and the expertise required to address  specific business tasks and projects.

Knowledge is the most strategically significant resource of a firm . Knowledge management usage  helps you make good use of the company's  most important intellectual capital - the information possessed by the employees. Knowledge,as they say, is power. Once they have been in business for a number of years most companies will find that they have accumulated a vast repository  of information and expertise.

Facilitates decision making capabilities:

Until now the use of big data has largely been restricted to it experts but there is a growing need to use data for quick decision making among departments that are directly involved in product strategy or sales. Users can perform intuitive operations to conduct multi-faceted analysis from a variety of business perspectives. Organizations are facing exciting and dynamic challenges. Strategy is the direction and scope of an organization over the long term which achieves competitive advantage in a changing environment through its configuration of resources and competences with the aim of  fulfilling stakeholder expectations.

The main purpose of evolving architecture is to satisfy advanced capability and performance objectives through adding new systems ,replacing existing systems etc...It is unrealistic to improve performance without considering the cost of architectural evolution's. Competitive advantage is when a company's profitability is greater than the average of all other companies in the same industry that compete for the same customers.

When the external environment is subject to rapid change ,resources and capabilities offer a more secure basis for strategy than market focus.

BUILDING LEARNING ORGANIZATIONS BY MAKING LEARNING ROUTINE:

Innovation is not a one day phenomenon. In the area of global competitiveness knowledge management became essential for all the members of the top organisations. Knowledge management is important to the success of your company. Data can offer managers a wealth of information but processing overwhelming amounts can get in the way of achieving high-quality decisions. Actively managing knowledge is important to an organizations success.

Knowledge management approach benefits your organisation by providing a defined strategy for collaborating and disseminating information across the organisation retaining explicit knowledge.Scientists have worked out exactly how much data is sent to a typical person in the course of a year the equivalent of every person in the world reading 174 newspapers every single day. Knowledge management can create a culture where everyone continuously accesses themselves ,their units and their organisations looking for ways to improve.

Continuous improvement programs are sprouting up all over as organisations strive to better themselves and gain an edge. Solving a problem,introducing a product and re-engineering a process all require seeing the world in a new light and acting accordingly. Provide your team with the insight,expert knowledge, and information they need. combine the power of internal knowledge with social networks to optimize their effectiveness and readiness. 

STIMULATES CULTURAL CHANGE AND INNOVATION:

Innovation is essential to business survival. Every organisation has to be unique at something,at least for a while,to stay ahead of the game. Ten key levers built  into any project or process effort can dramatically improve results and create a culture of continuous improvement and creativity. Some of the best ideas for process improvement lies with the process owners. There are some critical change issues that will affect managers in the 21st century. 

Changing organizational cultures is one of those issues.One of the main insight is that a combination of variables must be in place to stimulate internal product innovation.There is also no one-size-fits-all to organisational structure.

Sleep and health

Sleep makes you feel better but its importance goes way beyond just boosting your mood and banishing under eye circles.Adequate sleep is a key part of healthy life style and can benifit your physical health and mental health as well. Studies show that the gap between getting just enough sleep and getting too little sleep can effect your health,your mood and even your sex life.In most cases the health risks from sleep loss only becomes serious after years.

It may seem obvious that sleep is beneficial.Scientists have gone to great lengths to fully understand sleep's benefits.When we miss sleep inorder to keep up with our 24/7 world, we pay a price with our ability to learn , our health and safety and our quality of life.Most of what we know of sleeps functions can be seen in light of what goes wrong when we deprive ourselves of this vital activity. Sleep is food for the brain. During sleep important body functions and brain activity occur.

The way you feel while you are awake depends in part on what happens while you are sleeping. During sleep your body is working to support healthy brain function and maintain your physical health. It can be tempting to trade sleep for a few precious hours of wakefulness, but it is important to consider the hidden costs. Sleep is precious, too. People who have problems with sleep are at increased risk in developing emotional disorders.

Sleep like nutrition and physical activity is a critical determinant of health and well being. Sleep loss and untreated sleep disorders influence basic patterns of behavior that negatively effect family health and interpersonal relationships. Quality sleep is sometimes elusive. Although you mightnot be able to control all of the factors that interfere with your sleep you can adopt habits that can encourage better sleep.

WHY DO WE NEED TO SLEEP ANYWAY? 

Our bodies regulate sleep in much the same way they regulate eating ,drinking and breathing. One way to think about the function of sleep is  to compare it to another one of our life sustaining activities eating. Science is still searching for the full understanding of brain but we may safely assume that we need sleep because of our sensory overload that takes place during the waking hours. The brain need time to sort out the data that entered it through all the sensory organs and that is why we may assume that we sleep eventhough it is not proven as a fact by science.

CONSEQUENCES OF INSUFFICIENT SLEEP

Most people dont get enough sleep. The price of insufficient sleep may be poor health. Sleep loss is big public safety hazard every day on the road. Sleep plays a critical role in thinking and learning. Sleep deprivation induces significant reduction in performance and alertness.

Decreased alertness and excessive daytime sleepiness impairs your memory. You need sleep as much as you need to breathe and eat. When you are deprived of sleep your brain cant function properly affecting your emotional state. Many effects of lack of sleep such as feeling grumpy and not working at your best are well known. However the cost of all those sleepless nights  is more than just bad moods and a lack of focus.

The immediate effects of skimping on sleep are obvious.The average adult needs about seven to nine hours of sleep each night but most of us don't even get that much. Sleep is increasingly recognized as important to public health with sleep insufficiency linked to  motor vehicle crashes industrial disasters and medical and other occupational errors. In recognition of the importance of sleep to the nations health surveillance of the sleep related behaviors has increased in recent years. British research studies have shown that people who have irregular sleep patterns on a daily basis  have a higher mortality rate.

Serious accidents are very often linked to lack of sleep and fatigue.Chronic sleep loss and associated sleepiness and daytime impairments in adolescence are a serious threat to academic success,health and safety of our nations youth  and an important public health issue. There have been a considerable number of articles published pertaining to sleep.

HISTORICAL AND CULTURAL PERSPECTIVES OF SLEEP

sleep or at least a daily period of rest has likely been part of life since the beginning of evolutionary time. In humans sleep patterns have changed over the centuries even if our need for sleep hasn't. Sleep is something we have in common not only with all humans but with all of earths organisms. At various times people have gone to great lengths to make sleep more comfortable. Sleep deprivation and poor sleep quality are highly common among children and youth.

Although sleep is a fundamental biological process that effects the health and well being of all ages it is also a social phenomenon.Most of the sleep tips you find in western parenting books, and magazines are based on cultural assumptions about what constitutes good sleep.Many people subject themselves to artificial lights and electronic gadgets. Due to this they have to face difficulty in falling asleep.

Sleep medicine is a relatively new scientific specialty.Sleep medicine is considered relatively new field of medicine but mankind has long been interested in sleep and culture and religion influence attitudes and belief about sleep. 

HAVE A NICE DAY.